I feel like you’re missing the reference we’re making.

Gaston:

When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs

Ev’ry morning to help me get large

And now that I’m grown I eat five dozen eggs

So I’m roughly the size of a barge

Okay, but how are your expectorating skills? Can anybody spit like you?

If you set one end up in an air-tight room with an airlock, it would be just like a door from a mars station.

For safety’s sake, it might be better to put that on a space station, though. Better to wreck Mars than equalize Earth and Mars.

So it’ll be just like the bag full of Maximum Heal potions when the credits roll, except I imagine you could pass it on to someone with a message not to wait for the perfect moment.

With a diet like that he’d be roughly the size of a barge!