i just broke up with my bf who ghosted me bc he realized he’s gay (im a woman). i don’t even think i like guys but i have this compulsion to ask out my friend who i blocked to have a man that treats me right instead of the other guy that ghosted me, and also to make him happy.
he kept talking about how he could treat me better than anyone else, that i should’ve ditched my bf for him (obv i said no), and badmouthed not only his gf of a few years since age 16 but also his first time. he left her bc she showed signs of schizophrenia and she blocked all his socials after he left.
he kept guilttripping me when i said i didn’t want to be his gf so ik he doesn’t care about consent regardless of what he says. he also completely ignored me liking women and acted like i was straight but i feel lonely.
i kinda wanna make him happy and have a bf who pays attention to me but ik i’m probably just saying this out of sadness. we were friends but i had to block.
Someone who will treat you well won’t need to tell you that they will treat you well. It’s kind of like how liars and scammers make a big deal about how honest they are. Another big clue is that he was telling you this while both of you were with other people. He cheats on one partner, he’d cheat on you, too.
he broke up before he said all this. he was clearly into me and hitting on me before they broke up though, and the rest still stands. tysm
i agree with this. also, i feel like if they do it (he never said if they wore protection), the girl might’ve been acting weird because she was pregnant and he just leaves her. that’s sick.
(i cant say for sure but it might be a possibility)
op, it’s possible that he just wants u to meet up with him, have sex, and then leave once u either dont act how he wants u too or if u get pregnant. since he doesn’t seem to take no for an answer, he could also either pressure you into sex or just pressure you into not wearing protection if you choose to do so.
he doesn’t accept dissent in other matters, why would he in sex? especially if he discusses sexual topics with you. it’s very common for gross people like him who don’t take no for an answer, especially when wanting sex, to r*pe their partners.
You blocked them for a reason.
You basically just described a walking, talking red flag. What an asshole. That’s your answer btw: no.
Also, just going into a relationship to cure your loneliness is insultingly unfair for your future partner. This red flag is on you.
Just sort your own stuff out and stay away from any relationship for a while. You will only hurt yourself and others when starting one now.
that makes sense, you’re right. i reworded it, i realized how wrong it sounded
You don’t want that guy. What you want is attention, and he was the last person to give it to you, therefore you think you want him.
Just get dressed up and go to a bar, and you’ll find enough guys who will give you that, without the red flags.
Girl, I can’t believe no one here is telling you that the behavior you’ve described is absolutely not “having a man that treats you right”. Guilt tripping, trashing his own girlfriend while being with her, telling you to be unfaithful, ignoring your homosexuality…
Hell, the way you’ve described him makes me wonder if his girlfriend was actually schizophrenic or if he just gaslit the fuck out of her and ditched her when it started to catch up to him. Did you know her personally? Did she show signs of schizophrenia that couldn’t be explained by gaslighting? Did he try to work with her through her potential schizophrenia? That’d be another huge red flag: if she showed signs of disability and instead of trying to work with her, he dumped her.
Don’t do it.
You’re just sad, hurt, and about to get yourself into a hell of a lot more hurt if you listen to this strange compulsion of yours. Chill. Take a deep breath. Find some lesbian chicks. There’ve gotta be dommy lesbians around you if you’re in a somewhat populated area in the US. Make friends, fuck your friends, have fun, and maybe you’ll eventually end up with a girlfriend or two (and maybe a trans puppygirl too).
i didn’t know all the details, he just said that she showed signs of schizophrenia and acted weird. i didn’t know her and didn’t know their relationship, but i know he did leave her because she had hallucinations, paranoia, thought objects were real (like dolls), and apparently age regressed a lot. he said she got too clingy and “weird” and even “crazy” for his liking. (which ik that word is stigmatizing in that context because in high school, we were told not to call ppl who showed signs of mental illness crazy)
He sounds extremely abusive.
You don’t genuinely like him, you’re just lonely. Plus, he doesn’t respect you at all, or his previous girlfriend. He won’t treat you right, but let’s be honest, even if he was the greatest man in the world, you’re not actually into him.
It sounds like you’re having a really hard time and you just want some tenderness and support, but you won’t get it from a misogynist.
Keep him blocked, and take care of yourself.
thanks so much 🫂 gave me the ick a little that he barely acknowledged that i liked girls. he only cared about if i liked guys or had a bf, he only got upset when i liked a guy.
it’s almost as if he was trying to act like i was straight, which was a bit insulting to me. if i had a gf/liked a girl, he would act like that meant i was just single and not attracted to anyone at all.
Listen to that ick!! That’s the part of you that knows your worth
Oh god you’re a mess. Don’t date women either….
That man has more red flags than a flag football team.
Sounds perfect for this woman with a nearly equal amount of red flags
